Continuing to soul search…
I feel like sometimes I say the same thing every time I’m writing here
What do I want this space to be?-me, every time I write here
Twice this calendar year I’ve come very very close to just shutting the whole thing down. Other thoughts include locking it up behind a password and calling it done, the virtual version of closing shop without the data loss (FOMO).
And then I tell myself I won’t do it out of obligation- I’ll only do it when I want to. Then the middle of the month rolls around, it’s time to post about my iPhone Home Screen, and I’m not interested in writing it or its not the priority.
That’s the magic reality that I’m only just now coming to terms with: this is not the priority. There was a point in time where that was not true. There was a point in time in my life not all that long ago where writing and publishing was something I’d wake up early, stay up late, or readjust my priorities for the day for. That is no longer the case.
It has been hard for me to come to terms with this, but my priorities have shifted and She Does Better is no longer it. I think I’ve been slowly coming around to this. I removed the “Work with me” page some time ago (when I decided that I was no longer interested in working with brands). I removed the “Press” page more recently (when I decided I was no longer going to seek those sorts of opportunities and they didn’t add any value to the site). Most recently, I rerouted the about link to my website because I thought the about page was too salesy (selling what? selling myself?) but
I don’t have the time to rewrite it rewriting it isn’t a priority.
I was recently promoted at work and I’m really excited for the opportunity, but also know that I need to step it up (with, I think a #SummerofCode, but jury is still out). C’s next deployment is approaching more quickly than I’d like. I’m going to back to school in the fall (should I do this? another question for another time). I’m finally losing weight and getting strong again, and I want to keep moving in that direction. These are my actual priorities.
Given, then, that this space is not a priority to me and I’m not emotionally ready to just delete, what do I do?
I don’t know, but I welcome thoughts.
Emilie is an Army Wife, Data Engineer, and CrossFitter with a love for working through her thoughts in this space on the internet. She lives with her husband Casey and their pup Bo in Savannah, GA.